Suddenly One Summer, My First Summer of Love Summer is my favourite season: the long days when it stays light until past nine o'clock, the bright early mornings when you can get up and feel as if anything is possible, the smell of cut grass, the gay pride festivals all over the country, the opportunity to visit the beach and spot CYTs (cute young things) or men wearing the latest tightly sculpted tiny swimming trunks, it always feels as if anything's possible during this season.
Have you ever had a friendship that lasted one summer? A perfect brightly burning friend who you did everything with, and felt like you'd be friends forever, and then it was over in September, never to see one another again? I've had friendships that lasted the length of a gay pride festival. I've had friendships during a summer holidays activities club when we did everything together, but then never heard from one another again because, no mobile phones and different schools, and...reasons. But the one of the best things that happened to me, suddenly one summer was when I fell in love a little bit with a man. I'm not talking first boyfriend, no that wasn't for another quite a few years, oh no, this was the heart beating in your chest, sweaty palms, can't make eye contact, laughing at everything he says falling in love you get when you're too young to really understand what it is at the time. I had a heroic sized crush on one of the leaders of the play club the summer when I was 14. That was my first summer of love. At the time I didn't realise it was a crush, never mind a heroic sized one. I simply thought I really really liked this man and wanted to be as near to him as possible all day, and when he didn't turn up to take the class, I almost cried.
Luke, he was called. He wore blue Nike shell suits with white crew neck T shirts underneath the zip up top, and white box-fresh Nike trainers. Sometimes he had a whistle round his neck which he would blow to catch our attention during the activities. His hair was black and floppy in a centre parting curtains style.
He. Was. Magnificent.
At the time I thought I wanted to be him. But when I was a few years older, oh the advantages of hindsight, I realised I had actually fallen in love with him, just a little bit.
He was funny, clever, interesting, listened to me, and oh so wise. Of course he was wise, he was eighteen or nineteen, he was an adult. He had everything sorted, like all adults do, or so I thought then.
Suddenly one summer, a long hot summer with an almost never ending supply of weeks away from school in September, archery lessons, roller skating, and five a side football, they announced that one of the activities was to be swimming in the local swimming complex. I remember inexplicably becoming oh so very excited that I would be able to see Luke in a pair of swimming shorts. But I didn't understand why this excited me so much! Sky blue, Nike swimming shorts that came half way down to his knees. His legs were covered in dark hairs, and his gently tanned chest, with two pectoral muscles showing off all the physical activity he did, but not bulging like a body builder, had a dusting of dark hairs across the middle and in a little trail from his navel into his shorts. Later, when I met and talked to actual real life living, gay men, I was told it's called the snail trail. But that summer, in that swimming complex in Hampshire, I suddenly found myself drawn to this man, to looking at him, talking to him, listening to him talking to other people. But only because I wanted to be him, you understand?
And then, to make matters even worse, there was the dripping blue swimming shorts incident, when I met Luke, dripping wet at the edge of the pool, hands above his head, doing some warm up / stretches / something or other and I didn't know where to look. All I knew was I needed to stay there, talking to dripping wet Luke, in his blue Nike swimming shorts, for as long as I could.
After this, for some strange reason, when we were back at the activities centre, as he taught me archery, or gymnastics, or made small talk about why I thought my mum was late again, picking me up at the end of the day, I could hardly look him in the eyes – the dark brown eyes – because if I did, he would know. He would know it was all I could do to stop myself leaning forward and stroking his cheek. Because, I wanted to be him. Because I wanted to be his friend. Honestly! It was so obvious to everyone except me, that I couldn't see what was at the end of my nose.
That was the last summer I went to the activities centre. Apparently I was old enough to fend for myself by next summer. Who knows what happened to Luke. I'm sure he never thinks about any of the young people he taught sport to that summer, never mind me in particular, but he will always have a place in my heart as the first real live man I fell in love with, a little bit.
Sometimes people can sweep into your life and make you see things in a totally different way, even if it's some time afterwards. Even the friends I've had for a day will have affected how I see things, will have told me things, given me phrases they say, changed my outlook on life, shaped me into the person I am today. Sometimes someone comes into your life at exactly the right time, and you see what you couldn't see for looking before; what's been at the end of your nose all along.
Suddenly, during the summer of 1999, when all men had floppy centre parting curtains hair cuts and were wearing global hyper colour T shirts, baggy jeans and high top trainers, Gabe arrived into Dominic's orderly life. Both men were happily boyfriended, but sometimes it takes a stranger to show you something you couldn't see for looking until then.
The Book
Dominic’s suburban, carefully planned life with his boyfriend Luke is perfect: his job as a nurse; his best friend Matt; his relationship with his parents. He clung to Luke for safety as they watched their friends die during the early nineties.
Fate throws Gabe into Dominic’s life. And then that happened. They click over a shared love of Goldie Hawn. Gabe shows Dominic there’s more to life than planned and safe. Despite this Gabe clings to his boyfriend, A even though he’s not happy because, well it’s complicated.
And Then That Happened is about looking for happiness, even if you think everything’s perfect. And how if you plaster on a fake smile, sooner or later it’ll fall off.
Buy Links
Amazon (US) | Amazon (UK) | ARe | Smashwords | B&N | iTunes | Kobo
All books in the 11/11 $2.99 sale
The Summer House by RJ ScottHeat by Chris Quinton & RJ Scott
Alter Ego by Meredith Russell
The Bucket List by RJ Scott
Last First Kiss by Diane Adams
Dead Things by Meredith Russell
The Last Wolf by Sue Brown
And Then That Happened by Liam Livings
Theory Unproven by Lillian Francis
One Night by RJ Scott
The Art of Words by RJ Scott & Meredith Russell
Post a Comment